An article I was reading today attempts to explain who is actually planning to get up at 3AM on Friday morning to watch the royal wedding. The article says it will be predominantly "nostalgia freaks and romance geeks". Could you be more specific? We can...WHO ARE THE PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO WATCH THE ROYAL WEDDING?
2% are just lifelong fans of pomp, pageantry and parading, parasitic puss-buckets.
4% are insomniacs with a fleeting interest in the history of British inbreeding.
6% are terrorists looking for reasons to hate America who don’t realize England isn't our 51st state.
7% are drag queens just looking for fashion tips.
9% are geologists who would normally have to go to the Grand Canyon to see as many crags and crevices as they can see by tuning in to see Camilla's face.
12% are single middle-aged women with way too many cats.
13% are single middle-aged gay men with way too many cats.
18% are the same people who listen to the Rick and Len Show; prison in-mates and elderly shut-ins who are near-fatally starved for any contact with the outside world.
29% are nearsighted horse-racing enthusiasts who have mistaken the procession of the Royal Family members for the number 7 race at Aqueduct.
No comments:
Post a Comment