Friday, May 28, 2010


See some of the best f$#%ing bands play some of the best f$#%ing songs at the world's largest f$#%ing music fest.

Every weekday morning at about 9 we will continue to play your choices for THE BEST F$#%ING SONG OF ALL TIME!

Each day we'll select one entry and play that day's BEST F$#%ING SONG OF ALL TIME!

If we select your entry between now and June 18th, we'll put you in a drawing to win a 4 pack of tickets for Summerfest AND $100 in Summerfest gift cards that can be used for:

* Summerfest admission tickets
* Marcus Amphitheater concert tickets
* Food and Beverages
* Cool Summerfest merchandise
* Jimmying a lock on a cheap door

Just click the BEST F$#%ING SONG OF ALL TIME icon above or on the right and make your case for what you think is the BEST F$#%ING SONG OF ALL TIME! If you convince us that your selection is the BEST F$#%ING SONG OF ALL TIME you may end up partying like a big f$#%ing rock star at Summerfest!


We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Weenie of the Week…The highly intoxicated Green Lake County man who frightened the residents of a home near Princeton Monday night. The home owner told police that she feared the man was trying to enter her home and thought she had heard one or more gun shots. Responding sheriff's deputies found the suspect not carrying a gun and armed only with a old bicycle seat. Deputies determined the gun shots the caller had heard were actually just the sound of the man repeatedly hitting the side of the caller's house with the bicycle seat. The bicycle seat wielding man eventually realized that, due to his level of intoxication, he was pounding on the wrong house. Deputies arrested the man but didn't say why he was carrying a bicycle seat.


For not realizing that even if the only part of a bicycle you have is the seat, it's no reason to get Huffy.

For proving that there are crimes you can commit with a bicycle seat that don't even involve sniffing it.

And for actions that could get him locked up with someone who will be happy to pound his seat for him.

We are proud to name the intoxicated Green Lake County man who frightened the residents of a home near Princeton when he pounded on the wrong house with his bike seat as this week's Rick and Len...WEENIE OF THE WEEK.


Damn this is funny!

Thursday, May 27, 2010


Nicholas Anthony will join Rick and Len Friday morning! Why? Sadly, because he has nothing better to do! Well, that and because he's appearing at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton.

Tonight (5.27) is WAPL night. Mention that when you make your reservation and get 2 for 1 admission! 920-734-JOKE.

If you can't see him tonight, check him out Friday or Saturday night.

Look for me at one of the Saturday night shows and, if you see me, come by and say "hi" and I PROMISE I will pay the drink tab for your entire group!!!

How can I afford to make that promise? Simple. I won't be at the Skyline Saturday night. But you're free to look for me. In the meantime, get a little sample of Nicholas Anthony bringing the funny in the clip below.


Monday, May 24, 2010


May 18th City of Beaver Dam
Police received an anonymous report about a group of teens standing in the roadway on North Spring Street. Police made contact with the teens and found out that they were just throwing bottles in the air.

May 16th City of Beaver Dam
An employee at a restaurant on Front Street reported that there were people there who did not want to pay the full price of their food. The customers explained to officers that the food they were served was cold, however, admitted that they did eat it all. They were instructed by police to pay for the food.

May 12th Village of Randolph
An officer responded to a report of an intoxicated man driving a riding lawn mower with a chainsaw attached to the front.

May 19th City of Marshfield
A South Maple Street man requested police check on his 31-year-old neighbor who had been up all night...chanting.

May 16th City of West Allis
Police were called to Pick 'n Save where a 17-year-old boy was caught shoplifting a package of Playtex tampons. According to police, a value estimate for the tampons was not available.

May 17th City of Beaver Dam
A man called police from Stone Street telling them he wanted two people removed from his father's funeral dinner. The people had not been invited. They left quietly after they finished eating.

May 15th City of Wausau
Police received a report of the theft of a 1994 Mercury Cougar valued at $1,700 that contained the cremated remains of the owner's father and grandfather. Upon investigation, officers learned that the car was towed and crushed for scrap. The whereabouts of the cremated remains remains unknown.


Clearly the dumbest thing I've seen in eons was an article I ran across this weekend. A columnist in a Michigan newspaper was concerned that her two aging dogs had not lived fulfilling lives. As a result, she suggested that all dog owners create a "bucket list" of things their pooch wants to do before they die. WTF?

Well, as stupid as that is, here's what might be on your dog's "bucket list" (if you had a dog and if you were bat sh*t crazy enough to make a list for him.)


10. Order one of everything off the menu at Lombardi's Steak House.

9. Visit The White House, The Vatican and Buckingham Palace...and drink out of their toilets.

8. Put a tight, gay-ass looking collar around your neck and walk you around the frickin' neighborhood on a leash.

7. To hell with doogie style, would, just once, like to do it missionary.

6. Finally catch that g-damn chuck wagon.

5. Neuter Bob Barker.

4. How about you fetch the stick one time, a-hole.

3. You know that thing you do when you pretend to throw the ball and he runs after it but it's still in your hand? The next time you do that...respond by biting your nuts off.

2. Bang that bitch, Lassie.

1. Sniff a little schnauzer ass!

Friday, May 21, 2010


Not all the great talent is here in our country. Check out this performance from the auditions for Indian Idol! (How can this not make you smile?)


We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Weenie of the Week…the Green Bay man on Phoebe Street who, after a long night of drinking, awoke to find the bed he was sleeping in soaked in urine and, naturally, BLAMED HIS DOG whom he then punched 20 times.


For apparently having as much trouble controlling his anger as he has controlling his bladder.

For committing an act, for which the only suitable punishment is tossing him naked into a pen of pit bulls wearing only a condom made of kibble.

And for not understanding that "denial" is not just a river in's also a good name for the river of urine running from his own drunken, shriveled wiener to his Sealy Posturpedic.

We are proud to name the Green Bay man, who blamed his dog for his own bed being wet after a night of heavy drinking, as this week's Rick and Len...WEENIE OF THE WEEK.

Thursday, May 20, 2010


We've had hundreds of comics on the show over the years, but tomorrow we'll be joined by the only one I know of who has farted on Jessica Simpson. Really! Don't miss Josh Sneed at 8 Friday morning on the Rick and Len Show.

And see him live at the Skyline Comedy Cafe. Tonight is WAPL night. Mention it when you make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE and they'll give you 2-for-1 admission.

If you can't make it Thursday, you can see him Friday or Saturday night, but you'll have to pay the still very reasonable $10 bucks a person. Hey, it's your life!


A lingerie store in San Antonio has been notified that they need to secure a food vendor's permit. Why would a lingerie store need a food vendor's permit? Because they sell Edible Undies. Seriously! (And you thought Appleton was bad!)

You know, I never really thought of Edible Undies as "food" before. But this got me to wondering. What if Edible Undies became the next trendy food item and suddenly every restaurant has something made with Edible Undies on their menu? You know, like how every restaurant now has something made with chipotle. Here's some suggestions for some well known restaurants.

RED LOBSTER...could starting serving the edible panties with crabs inside and call it the Paris Hilton wrap.

McDONALD'S...could start serving a McUndie sandwich. It doesn't matter what's inside as long as you've got some nice buns to go with those panties.

TACO BELL...while panties and tacos seem like a natural, if you peel back undies and find a big burrito, you’ll probably want to make a run for the border.

SONIC...should keep edible undies off their menu since only a real sicko would want their tots with edible panties.

PIZZA HUT...could create an edible undie pizza. However, I'll be the first to admit that panties that have cheese and a crust might be a tough sell.

KFC...could starting serving their friend chicken inside the edible panties since the edible undies have always been intended to be eaten with something that is finger lickin’ good.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


Must have been a Double Shot Tuesday for this sit-com star. Find out who it is during More Than We Really Wanted to Know in the 8-o-clock hour on this morning's Rick and Len Show.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010


Green Bay police are looking into who fired two bullet holes into the glass Atrium at Lambeau Field this week. In an effort to help police, we assembled...


10. After re-watching Packers play off loss to Arizona, someone decided that Lambeau should have at least a fraction of the number of holes as the team's defense.

9. Even after 6 years, some people still upset about 4th and 26.

8. Shots fired by Mason Crosby in a effort to prove that he can hit something, even if it took a structure a thousand times bigger than the broadside of a barn to do so.

7. Johnny Jolly's dealer just sending a message.

6. Atrium fired the shots it's self in effort to end it all rather than spend another season serving as venue for FOX 11's god-awful post game show with Drew Smith and Johnny Gray.

5. Those aren't bullet holes. Pittsburgh QB Ben Roethlisberger visited town and penetrated the Atrium against it's will.

4. Shots fired by Packer receivers coach in effort to attract Plaxico Burress to the team once he's paroled.

3. "Half percent sales tax, my ass!"

2. Shot at window after mishearing a discussion about the Packer GM and didn't want Ted Thompson to be the only "glass hole" at Lambeau.

1. Damn, that Favre holds a grudge!

Monday, May 17, 2010


April 29th Town of Menasha
Police were called to school on Midway Road where a student caused a disturbance in science class by making sexual comments, refusing to follow rules and jabbing another student in the back with a ruler.

May 2nd City of Neenah
A Stevens Street resident called police to report that a 4-year- old girl was missing. The caller then called back to say the girl had been located in the house, however, the caller had locked themselves outside. A short time later the girl opened the back door to the house and the caller was able to get back inside.

April 30th City of Appleton
An officer checking a suspicious vehicle about 8 p.m. found an 18-year-old man and a 17-year-old girl making out on Witzke Road. The couple said they were boyfriend and girlfriend, and were released after the girl's parents were notified.

April 27th Calumet County
Police received a report of a chicken eating dog on the loose on the North 7000 block of Highway 55. The caller stated that the dog ate some of his chickens though he didn't know exactly how many. Police located the chicken eating dog and picked it up.

May 3rd City of Mayville
Police responded to a call from Mountin's Piggly Wiggly where a 43-year-old man and a 37-year-old woman were arguing about the location of food in the store.

Friday, May 14, 2010


Wednesday, police in Milwaukee raided a house filled with hundreds of reptiles including alligators and snakes. A police spokeswoman said that reptiles and rodents were found in the home and inside a building doubling as a storage facility and residence. At least five anaconda snakes 20 to 30 feet long were found, along with spiders and a chicken. This seems to be a good time to revisit one of our favorite subjects...


If you have more varieties of weasel than a national convention of football might have too many pets.

If you go through more cans of dog food than an entire senior citizen housing might have too many pets.

If your home is more tightly packed with gerbils than Richard Gere's might have too many pets.

If you have more creeping, crawling things in your pantry than Lindsey Lohan has in her might have too many pets.

If you have enough turkeys to anchor a FOX 11 might have too many pets.

If you have enough sheep for a ménage a might want to give Rick a call!

If your dining room floor has more hairballs than Robin Williams' shower might have too many pets you might have too many pets.

If you have more breeds of dog than a Korean might have too many pets you might have too many pets.

And if your home has more chickens than a French military definitely have too many pets.


We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Weenie of the Week...46-year-old Michael Vinson of Two Rivers who last week, when his pregnant girlfriend told him she was in labor, didn't respond by rushing her to the hospital. Instead, he allegedly demanded she give him money to buy beer and, when she only gave him a third of her monthly disability check, punched her in the head and threatened her with a butcher knife.


For apparent actions so bizarre and beyond the pale it makes you want to permanently retire the letters W.T. and F.

For reportedly doing something so epically appalling it made me want to write a poem about it but unfortunately there is nothing that rhymes with "jaw-dropping douchebaggery".

And for allegedly showing no compassion for a person in great discomfort with something large and painful in one of their orifices...a sensation he may have an opportunity to experience himself should he end up in prison.

We are proud to name the Michael Vinson of Two Rivers as this week's Rick and Len...WEENIE OF THE WEEK.


Thursday, May 13, 2010


He's the star of movies like How to Train Your Dragon, Cloverfield and She's Out of My League and one of Comedy Centrals 8 comics to watch for 2010. T.J. Miller returns to the Rick and Len show Friday morning.

See him in person at the Skyline Comedy Cafe tonight through Saturday night. Make your reservations by calling 920-734-JOKE.


Adam Sandler is reportedly planning to develop the 2 and a half minute short film PIXELS, about New York being attacked by classic video game characters, into a major motion picture. If you haven't seen PIXELS, click below a take a look. Consider your space invaded!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010


A new report shows that due to the recession, tourism in our part of the state is down about 10 percent. Here's our suggestions of the:


10. Relocate Vice President Joe Biden to Little Chute. People will come from miles around to see him get slivers in his tongue every time he sticks his foot in his mouth while wearing wooden shoes.

9. Let people start playing in fountain at Appleton's old Avenue Mall and start promoting it as an "indoor water park".

8. Siphon some tourism business from Door County by lining highway from Illinois to the Fox Cities with aggressive "A-Holes Welcome" billboard campaign.

7. During summer months, require members of Appleton City Council to bend over while kneeling naked on College Avenue to serve as unique, easy to use bike racks.

6. Institute catchy new tourism slogans for area communities like "Follow Your Nose to Kaukauna", "Oshkosh: Now 20% Less Blighty", "Green Bay: With Over 100 Convenience Stores, Someplace to Rob is Always Just Around the Corner", and "Visit Menasha: No, Seriously!".

5. Hang sign on NBC 26's downtown Appleton store front window that reads "Watch monkeys at play" because hey, who doesn't love monkeys?

4. Book rafting expeditions on the Yellow River in downtown Fond du Lac. Make river self perpetuating by serving rafters plenty of beer.

3. Advertise on Animal Planet. Encourage pet owners to come here to tour the Gannett Newspapers printing plant to see where the paper they use to train their dogs comes from.

2. Promote driving through Highway 41 road construction as a fun adrenaline-boosting, death defying thrill ride. Take that, Great America!

1. As part of a Shop Downtown promotion, promise recipient of Appleton's 1000th parking ticket of the month a free urinal cake bearing the likeness of Mayor Tim Hannah.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


This past Thursday, a woman in Cincinnati accidentally left her 3-year-old daughter behind at Wal-Mart. Worse yet, she didn't realize it until the next day when a friend called to say she saw the girl on the news.

How could she not miss one of her children? Well, because she has 15!!!! Here are some signs...


If every time you arrive for your annual check-up, your gynecologist is wearing a miner’s hat and spelunking might have too many kids.

If your water has broken so many times, FEMA has parked a trailer on your might have too many kids.

If you've had more contractions than a commencement address by Larry the Cable might have too many kids.

If you live in a shoe and don't know what to might have too many kids. (I never understood that rhyme. "There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. Had so many children, she didn’t know what to do". Trust me, if she had that many children, she knew EXACTLY what to do!)

If your cooter has had more people come out than the cast of Operation: might have too many kids.

If the D.O.T has installed a "No Passing" lane in your birth definitely have too many kids.

Monday, May 10, 2010


Today, on the Yahoo! homepage there was an article about "The Dumbest Things You Can Do With Your Money". It was all stuff like hanging on to debt and falling in love with your investments. What a load of pish-posh! Here's OUR list of:


10. Publish a book of marital advice by Charlie Sheen.

9. Start a condom concession at a Star Trek Convention.

8. Market XXX sex tape staring the new Supreme Court nominee.

7. Open a shoe store in Kentucky.

6. Put a c-note on the Vikings to win the Super Bowl...any Super Bowl.

5. Start a Port-a-Potty business in Fond du Lac.

4. Open a whore house staffed entirely by the cast of The View.

3. Finance a chain of Barrack Obama smoking sesation clinics.

2. Start manufacturing religious themed "vagaziling" supplies for trendy nuns.

1. It's a tie: Buy shares in British Petroleum or shoreline property on the Gulf of Mexico.


May 4th Village of Denmark
Police cited a 17-year-old girl for shoplifting from Main Street Market. The girl was caught trying to steal a six-pack of Snickers bars and six cans of sardines.

April 29th City of Wauwatosa
Police responded to a call from security at the Mayfair Mall where a 25-year-old man was sleeping on the couches outside Barnes & Nobel. The man had been banned from the mall since 2009 after he fell through the ceiling of a bathroom.

April 21st City of Glendale
Police were called to a school on Nicolet Road where a
fight between two girls started in the gymnasium when one girl accidentally hit the other with a basketball and then apologized by yelling out "My bad". However, the girl who was hit with the basketball failed to hear the first girl say "My bad" leading to the altercation.

April 22nd City of Menasha
A John Street resident called police and wanted to speak to an officer about some kids who threw a lawn dart at him.

May 5th Village of Bellevue
Police saw a vehicle weaving on Interstate 43 and stopped it near Manitowoc Road. The 50-year-old driver had an open container of orange juice and vodka in the car. Police also found a loaf of bread in the car…with 34 methadone pills inside.

April 20th Village of Bellevue
Two 17-year-olds were cited by police for shoplifting two Quick Trim 14-day weight loss packs, a package of Crest White Strips, and some cherry flavored KY Jelly lubricant.

Friday, May 7, 2010


We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Weenie of the Week...Milton Summers of Green Bay who faces criminal charges for allegedly head-butting his son's 13-year-old lacrosse teammate and punching his coach. Summers reportedly yelled at several of his son's teammates and then grabbed one of the boys by the ears, head-butted him and then pushed him into a fence, According to reports, Summers then punched the boy's coach in the face twice when he tried to intervene.


For being more tightly wound than an obsessive compulsive's wristwatch.

For butting a 13-year-old boy with his head which at least put it to some use since he apparently doesn't utilize it for thinking.

For not being afraid to punch a coach which makes you wonder "Hey, where was this guy during Mike Sherman and Ray Rhodes years with the Packers".

We are proud to name Milton Summers of Green Bay, who allegedly head-butted one of his son's 13-year-old lacrosse teammates before punching the coach as this week's Rick and Len...WEENIE OF THE WEEK!

Thursday, May 6, 2010


Dwayne Kennedy's been on Letterman, Conan, and Kimmel and has had his own specials on Showtime and Comedy Central. Why would that be? Because he damn funny! That's why!

You can hear Dawyne on the air with us Friday morning about 8am and see him at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton tonight through Saturday. In fact, tonight is WAPL night. Mention that when you make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE and they'll give you 2 for 1 admission. It's the law!

Check out this clip to find out how Dwayne feels about religion, women and a half a slab of ribs! (some language not safe for work or baby showers)


If you're looking for a gift for mom for this Mother's Day, the folks at Awkward Family Photos just released a book jam-packed with pix from their popular website. Here's a few photos from the site that, in my mind, best celebrate the beauty of motherhood.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010


Many of us were frustrated by how the bad weather and tornado warnings messed with our TV viewing last night. For those of you who are still wondering what you missed due to local meteorologists flaunting the their "weather woodies", we got summaries of the interrupted and preempted shows from the networks.

On Glee, in an effort to expand it's audience beyond the young, the gay, and the acappella Madonna song enthusiasts; the New Directions glee club sang only tunes by Metallica. Teacher Will Schuester was brought up on manslaughter charges after tender male soprano Kurt died from internal bleeding when attempting to belt out "Give me fuel, “Give me fire, give me that which I desire'...and his larynx exploded.

On American Idol, when Ellen Degeneres leaned over to whisper something to Simon Cowell, the blunt Brit thrust his tongue so far down her throat it touched her G-spot. As the two began to passionately make-out, the hurt and jealous Ryan Seacrest jumped crying into the arms of Randy Jackson who assured the show host that he would always have his hot weekend with Simon in Sausalito to remember. As for the performances, who cares?

On Lost, Jack and Kate saved everyone's life with their ingenious plot to adopt Appleton's current smoking ban. Instead of attacking and killing the island's inhabitants, the dreaded smoke monster was forced to come no closer than 10 feet from island's front entrance.

On Dancing with the Stars, Pamela Anderson experienced a "wardrobe malfunction" when the industrial strength elastic in her bra snapped, killing host Tom Bergeron and knocking the all the gay out of judge Bruno Tonioli. Anderson was then voted off the show. When the results were announced, she shook her mammoth silicon moneymakers in judge Len Goodman's face while shouting "You voted these babies off?" Goodman was treated at a local hospital for facial lacerations commonly associated with motorboat injuries.


I was a little self-conscious about taking off my shoes in the studio for Toe Reader Sherri Lee Devereau today. I'm guessing I'm not the only person who's self-conscious about their tootsies. So, as a public service, we've put together some signs:


If when you take off your shoes in the car, someone immediately asks if they’re passing might have bad feet.

If there is so much jam between your toes, you’re nationally known as "Smucker Foot" might have bad feet.

If Dr. Scholl's has referred you to Dr. might have bad feet.

If your case of athlete's foot is so bad you need Absorbine might have bad feet.

If they smell so bad, even your ass asks "What died down there?" might have bad feet.

If bunions were onions, you’d have enough to make fajitas for might have bad feet.

If bunions were Funyuns, you’d have enough to feed a boatload of might have bad feet.

If you find more corns on your foot than you find in your stool...after a fireman’s definitely have bad feet.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010


Here are some of the listeners submitted toes our Gypsy Toe Reader may be analyzing on today show in the 8-o-clock hour.

Monday, May 3, 2010


This week the popular travel site released their annual list of Worst Hotel Horror Stories. The stories included one about a hotel where the room was flooded with raw sewage, another where all the guests' belongings were stolen from their room and still another where the guests had to step over drunken partiers to get in and out of their room. (I swear that last one was NOT at the hotel where we stayed on our International Incident tip!)

However, it could have been worse. Here's our list of:


If the bedspread has enough DNA on it to start your own genetics might be staying at a bad hotel.

If the faucet in the bathroom keeps drip, drip, might be staying at a bad hotel.

If the "sanitized for your protection" strip on your toilet is stuck to the might be staying at a bad hotel.

If the porn on Spectra-vision is a video of you and your spouse from the night might be staying at a bad hotel.

If the mattress is lumpier than my ass (and smellier, too!) might be staying at a bad hotel.

If in lieu of air conditioning, the desk clerk offers to give you a free ice water might be staying at a bad hotel.

The "fresh" flowers in your room still have an "In memoriam" ribbon might be staying at a bad hotel.

If that is NOT a Baby Ruth candy bar floating in the motel might be staying at a bad hotel.

And if the soap in your shower was made by boiling the fatty remains of the room's previous're definitely be staying at a bad hotel.


Wednesday morning, we'll be joined in the studio by professional "toe reader" Sherri Lee Devereau.

Send us a picture of your toes and Sherri may read your tootsies on the air. They might even end up in Sherri's upcoming how-to book on "toe reading". E-mail us a pic of your toes (cute, ugly, weird, we want them all!) at Also, include the phone number where we can reach you Wednesday morning during the reading.

Then tune in Wednesday morning at 8 and see if Sherri reads your toes (or just to find out if Len's ticklish!)


Not the strongest week for Small Town Crime...but what can you do?

April 14th City of Appleton
Police received a complaint from a 50-year-old woman who said her husband and neighbors had planted microchips in her apartment and were listening to her thoughts.

April 20th City of Marinette
A man on West Russell Street called police to report that while his vehicle was parked at his residence, someone stole a transistor radio and...30 cents.

April 30th City of Shawano
Police responded to a report of someone who urinated on the front door at the Wal-Mart. Officers are still attempting to locate the suspected urinator.

April 6th City of Wisconsin Rapids
Police received a report of a group of people...using vulgar language while playing disc golf.

April 12th City of Menasha
A man called police from jail to report the theft of his bicycle.