Monday, June 29, 2009

RODGERS COMPLETES PASS!

The New York Post is reporting that Aaron Rogers was spotted in New York on a date with Sports Illustrated swimsuit model (and grapefruit heiress) Julie Henderson. For those of you unfamiliar with Ms. Henderson's work, check it out below.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

MICHAEL PALASCAK

That nice, young Michael Palascak is returning to the Rick and Len Show Friday morning (6.26).

We first met Michael just last month when she stopped by the studio with comic Daryl Lennox. Michael was the middle act on the bill at Skyline Comedy Cafe that weekend. However, he proved to be so popular, Skyline has brought him back this weekend as the headliner.

See him tonight (6.25) and get two for one admission because it's WAPL night at Skyline.

Or check him out Friday or Saturday. Call 920-734-JOKE to make your reservations!

Here's a little sample from his appearance at Skyline last month...

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

THE AIR IS THICKER THAN BILL JARTZ NECK!

Hot enough for ya? Just how hot is is it this week.

IT'S SO HOT...

People are going hunting with Dick Cheney just for the extra air holes in their faces.

People are watching that Jon and Kate show just for the icy stares.

Brett Favre is signing with the Vikings just for the chilly reception from Packer fans.

Women are offering to have sex with Rick just because they think it will make them frigid.

Blogger Perez Hilton is hanging out with rappers just to get knocked cold.

Brewer batters are going to the plate just to get fanned.

Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich is soliciting more bribes just to get sent to the cooler.

The sun will make the bodies of those attending Country USA so red you won’t be able to tell necks from the rest of their bodies.

The only person who found a way to stay cool this week was Ed McMahon!

Friday, June 19, 2009

BLUEN AWAY!

Blue Man Group is coming to the Oneida Casino August 11th for two big shows as part of their big 15th Anniversary celebration. Tickets go on sale July 1st at 10am at Ticketstaronline.com.

Be listening to the Rick and Len Show to find out how you can win tickets this Monday morning (6.22)!

Oh, and by the way, the clip below....TOTALLY F'N ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Thursday, June 18, 2009

IFFT A PICTURE PAINTS A THOUSAND WORDS...

Eddie Ifft will be dragging his ass into the WAPL studio Friday morning (6.19) about 8am.

See him at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton tonight (6.18) and get two for one admission because it's WAPL night. (Make sure you remind them of that when you make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE!) If you can't make it out on a Thursday night, see Eddy Friday or Saturday at 8:00 or 10:15.

Here's Eddy talking about strippers and poop!


LORD OF THE FLIES

The President outraged the folks at PETA this week when he killed a fly during a televison interview.



HERE'S HOW OTHER POLITICAL FIGURES WOULD HAVE HANDLED THE FLY

Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy...would not have swatted the fly but instead would have drowned it by putting it in the passenger seat of his car and driving off a bridge.

Former President George W. Bush...would have found out what country the fly was from, then invaded it’s neighbor.

Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich...would not have harmed the fly...as a professional courtesy to a fellow parasite.

Alaska Governor Sarah Palin...would have shot the fly from a helicopter.

Senator Larry Craig...would have handled it the way he handles all flies...by unzipping it.

Former Wisconsin Governor Tommy Thompson...would just waited for the fly to land on his own skin where it would have it would have inevitably lapped up some of his perspiration...and then succumbed to cirrhosis of the liver.

Senator John Kerry...would have just shooed the fly away with his tail.

Green Bay Alderman Guy Zima...like the President, would have swatted the fly. Preferably before in laid eggs on the meat in his pants.

The Wisconsin Legislature...would have killed the fly the way it kills everything. By taxing it to death.

Talk show host Rush Limbaugh...would have declared the presence of the fly to be a sign of a nation in a state of moral decay that is rotting from within because of weak liberal leadership before stocking up on illegally obtained painkillers and Viagra and heading off to a country with a reputation for underage sex tourism.

Appleton Mayor Tim Hanna...wouldn’t have done anything to the fly. Somebody who's that full of crap must be surrounded by so many of them that he doesn’t even notice anymore.

Former Vice President Dick Cheney...would have captured the fly and detained it at off shore detainment facility where it would have been periodically water-boarded in an effort to learn if it has any knowledge of what other flies might be planning.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

GIDDY-UP!

Join us Thursday morning on the Rick and Len Show for our weekly edition of Rock Band, Race Horse of Porn film. In the mean time, check out this trailer for a new porn film. The concept intrigues but ultimately frightens me!

-Rick-

Monday, June 15, 2009

GENE SIMMONS EAT YOUR HEART OUT!

And yet, all he ever hears is "But can you breathe through your ears?"

Friday, June 12, 2009

ADAM FERRARA FROM RESCUE ME WITH RICK AND LEN

Adam Ferrara, one of the stars of the best show on television, Rescue Me, will chat with Rick and Len about 9:30 Friday morning (6.12). Adam's new stand-up comedy special, Funny as Hell, debuts tonight (6.12) at 10pm on Comedy Central. Here's a sample.


Jokes.com
Adam Ferrara - Communication Skills
comedians.comedycentral.com
Joke of the DayStand-Up ComedyFree Online Games


For a limited time, you can download Adam's comedy CD, Have Some, for FREE by clicking here!

ROGER, ROGER!

Roger Radley will return to the WAPL studio Friday morning (6.12) to hang with Rick and Len. You can see Roger at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton Friday or Saturday night at 8:00 or 10:15.

Call 920-734-joke to make your reservations.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

BROADWAY ABRASIONS

Here's the photos of Bret Michaels injuries following his accident on stage at the Tony Awards Sunday night.


Tuesday, June 9, 2009

OBAMA LIVE!



If you want tix to see the President during his town hall appearance at Southwest High in Green Bay on Thursday, sign up for the ticket lottery before noon today (6.9) right here.

Monday, June 8, 2009

SINGLE DAY 10KLF TIX FOR DAVE MATTHEWS!


Single day passes are now available for The Dave Matthews Band July 25th at the 10,000 Lakes Music Festival in Detroit Lakes, MN.
Dave is headlining the mainstage Saturday Night.
Click here for single day passes.
Len recommends doing the whole four day festival, however. Headliners include Widespread panic and Wilco in addition to Dave Matthews.
Click here to see what the entire 10KLF experience is all about.

UNSKINNY BOPPED (IN THE HEAD)

Poison's Bret Michaels was injured Sunday night performing at the Tony Awards. Yes, the Tony Awards! Take a look for yourself.

Friday, June 5, 2009

THE WHO (AND OTHERS) SELL OUT!

The folks at Fark.com recently challenged their followers to use Photoshop to create ads from classic album covers. Here are a few of my faves.

--Rick McNeal--





Thursday, June 4, 2009

WICKED BLUES ON FRIDAY'S SHOW!!!


World famous Milwaukee guitarist Greg Koch and former Storyville lead singer Malford Milligan join us for a live in-studio performance Friday, June 5th at 9 a.m.
Greg is a wicked good stringer who has a deal with Fender to conduct clinics and demonstrations all over the world. He is now hooked up with Malford, who used to sing with the tremendous group Storyville. They did a legendary in-studio performance at WAPL back in 1996.
Tune in and then see them live at Cranky Pat's in Neenah! Click here to hear tracks form their new cd. Click here for info on the Cranky Pat's show.

LAST COMIC STANDING'S JACKIE KASHIAN JOINS RICK AND LEN!

Wisconsin native Jackie Kashian joins Rick and Len for the first time Friday (6.5) morning. She's appearing thru Saturday at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton. Thursday night is WAPL night. Mention that when you make your reservations and you get 2 for 1 admission.

Check out this clip from Jackie on last season's Last Comic Standing on NBC.


Last Comic Standing 2008

CEREAL KILLER

A U.S. District Court judge in California has tossed out a complaint filed by a woman who said she purchased Cap'n Crunch with Crunchberries because she believed "crunchberries" were real fruit. Since the cereal didn't contain any real berries she beleives this constitutes fraud.

Aparently, Cap'n Crunch with Crunchberries needs a warning for stupid people that reads "WARNING: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS CRUNCHBERRIES.....DUMBASS!"

Here's some other products that should have warning labels to help stupid people.

FORD MUSTANG: Product is not really a horse.

BIRDSEYE FROZEN VEGETABLES: Does not contain actual bird’s eyes.

GERBER BABY FOOD: Made with only trace amounts of actual babies.

TROJAN CONDOMS: Not really manufactured or worn by ancient Greeks.

UNDERWOOD DEVILED HAM: Not associated with the devil, Satan, Beelzebub, Mephistopheles or any of their agents.

PEPPERIDGE FARM COOKIES: Cookies were baked. Not actually grown nor harvested on a farm.

MIRACLE WHIP SALAD DRESSING: While undeniably tasty, has not been recognized by the Catholic Church as an inexplicable phenomena that can only be explained by divine intervention.

POP-TARTS: Not made from real strumpets.

VOTE!!!!!!


The Kyle Megna Band from Kaukauna has beat out 800 other bands to become one of 4 finalist bands competing for a spot on the Briggs and Stratton stage at Summerfest. You can vote 10 times by clicking here . Do it before June 7th at 11:59pm and help them make a dream come true!

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

RICK'S OBSSESSED!




So, a few days ago I told you about the website awkwardfamilyphotos.com. Well, I've become obsessed with the above photo from the site. I know very little about the photo other than these people are REALLY excited to be having their photo taken with everyone's favorite celebrity murderer.

For a couple days, I had the picture set as the background wallpaper on the computer I use in the studio. However, I had to take it off because I couldn't stop staring at it. I want to know more about these people. From their facial expressions, I just get the feeling each and everyone of them has a story. I feel like I could write a novel and populate it with these people. Allow me to describe who I think these folks are.

I'd say the woman in the front, in the yellowish coat is a 3rd grade teacher at a parochial school. She likes to think that despite her job, she's a wild party chick. In reality, one Zima and she's out for the count.

I don't know anything about the guy with the beard, but he's needed back at the '60's mad scientist movie he wandered out of, pronto! I just hope those are his own sunglasses he's wearing, because if he's just in the process of returning them to O.J.'s ex-wife, they might as well start measuring him for a body bag now.

The woman with the curly hair, glasses and questionable dental work, closet to O.J., is a 61 year old retired hotel maid who has harbored a latent desire for a little "jungle love" since she sprouted her first pube and is using this, her first time close to a black man to "get a little of the strange". She may look like somebody's grandmother, but while everybody else is smiling because they are saying "cheese", she's smiling because, on the down low, she's grinding her inflamed lady parts against The Juice's built-in juice maker.

The guy in the cap, over O.J.'s left shoulder, isn't with the rest of these people. He was just going door to door to inform people that he's moved into their neighborhood, as the judge required, saw a crowd and wandered over to see if he could find any pre-pubescent boys with sweet tooths who could keep a secret.

The guy in the back wearing the Stetson-like hat is barely aware he's being photographed. He's too busy hoping to himself that people think the hat makes him look enough like Indiana Jones that they won't guess that he has a tiny penis.

The three guys in front of the hat guy, blue and yellow coat guy, Jim Carrey teeth guy and red shirt guy, just stumbled upon this scene when their Pride Parade took a wrong turn when someone got wind of a lube sale at the local Manhole Toy Emporium.

The girl in front of O.J., in a black coat with suspiciously perfect teeth is obviously a space alien. A pretty space alien. But a space alien, non-the-less. She and her saucer have just landed and she was dispatched to find a suitable subject for a good old fashioned anal probing. From the look on the face of the kid in front of her, she's found her man. Apparently, she gave him his first beer to make it hurt less.

I'm not sure what the deal is with the girl to anal boy's left, but despite her powder blue fleece jacket, I'm pretty sure she's really into leather. When you look at the photo it appears that she's looking right at you. Why? Because she is! And she's thinking about how much she'd like to make you eat a bug!

The girl on the extreme left of the photo, in light blue but out of focus is my favorite. I don't know what to say about her except I love her. Even blurry, she looks like she's sweet, personable, funny and a wild cat in the sack. Maybe it's just because most of the women I fall in love with look blurry, mainly because it usually only happens while I'm in an alcohol induced haze.

Finally, there's the guy to O.J.'s right, pointing at The Juice and making a face. He's just a douchebag.

Of course, these are all just my crazed impressions. As I say, I don't really know anything about these people but there's just something about this photo that makes me feel like I do. I'm sure they are, in reality, all fine, decent, upstanding folks. Well, fine, decent, upstanding folks who enjoy being photographed with a murderer! --Rick McNeal--

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

IT'S LIKE A DAY OF WAPL IN 7 MINUTES!

See how many of these 100 rock riffs you can name. Amazing!


A man who has spent the last 15 years volunteering as a clown died this past week in Ohio leaving some big shoes to fill. According to his local newspaper, Beppo the Clown was accorded "the highest honor a clown can receive". He was “carried to his resting spot by his fellow clowns.” Nice!
Rick and Len Speculated what the rest of the funeral ceremony was like.
TIMELINE OF THE BOPPO THE CLOWN FUNERAL.


11:00am: The hearse arrives at the cemetery.

11:05am: Boppo’s closest friends and colleagues, all 137 of them, get out of the backseat.

11:15am: While admiring beautiful memorial flower arrangements, mourners are squirted in the eyes with water.

11:30am: Mourners learn that plans for a closed casket have been stymied by Boppo’s size 18 feet.

11:40am: A distant relative from “out west” is so grief stricken, he won’t even get out of his barrel.

11:45am: A woman with thick pancake make-up and garish red lipstick, who most assumed was the widow, informs people she’s not a clown, but rather a reporter covering the event for NBC26.

11:50am: It is pointed out that being a clown and being an NBC26 reporter are not mutually exclusive.

Noon: The minister delivers the eulogy, summing up Boppo’s life with quote from the Gospel according to Chuckles. “A little song. A little dance. A little seltzer in your pants”.

12:05pm: A woman who looks suspiciously like Mary Tyler Moore is escorted from the service in hysterics.

12:15pm: Relative from France is asked to speak. Instead, says nothing despite appearing to be trapped in a box.

12:30pm: Funeral concludes with 21 seltzer bottle salute.

12:45pm: All will depart cemetery for reception lunch of rubber chicken and cream pies which instead of being served on a plate will just been thrown directly into mourners faces.

EMINEM TEA-BAG!






If you still haven't seen Sascha Baron Cohen in his guise as gay fashionista Bruno land nuts first on Eminem at the MTV Movie Awards, check out the video below. Or just delight at the look on Em's face in these slow-motion screen captures.