THERE'S METH TO FAVRE MADNESS.

NEXT FAVRE FAMILY SCANDAL

10. Sister found locked in Charlie Sheen's closet.

9. Lindsey Lohan and Amy Winehouse found in Brandi Favre's bathtub.

8. Brett appears on Dr. Phil after being found standing on side of highway with cardboard sign that reads "I have god given gift of a golden arm and have fallen on hard times".

7. Sex tape found. Which, since he's from Mississippi, requires the participation of at least one first cousin and/or barnyard animal.

6. Brett arrested shoplifting magnifying lens for camera phone.

5. Sister claims she thought meth in bathtub was just chewing gum.

4. Phone call from Deanna to Brett after she learned about his penis texts make Mel Gibson sound like Mr. Rogers.

3. After being dropped by Wrangler, Brett signs lucrative endorsement deal with Enzyte. ("This is Brett. Brett is doing well. Very well indeed. Brett realized that he could have something better in his life. And what did he get? A big boost of confidence. A little more self esteem. And a very happy misses at home".)

2. Pee Wee Herman tells tabloids Brett actually injured his shoulder giving him a hand in a movie theater.

1. Brother finds lost hikers. Tells one with "purdy mouth" to squeal.