Thursday, June 3, 2010

WHERE NOBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME

ESQUIRE Magazine has just put out their annual "Best Bars in America" issue. As a sidebar, they list some signs you are in a bad bar. For instance, if all the bartenders are wearing name tags. I couldn't agree more. However, here's the Rick and Len shows own...

SIGNS YOU'RE IN A BAD BAR

If not only does the beer smell skunky, so do several parts of your waitress...you might be in a bad bar.

If you can't hear the jukebox over the sound of Ugly Betty blaring from the television...you might be in a bad bar.

If you can't hear the jukebox over the sound of ugly Betty, while she’s waiting on tables...you might be in a bad bar.

If the only tunes on the jukebox are Vanilla Ice's greatest hits...redone by Celine Dion...you might be in a bad bar.

If the glasses are as filthy as a Lindsey Lohan pap smear...you might be in a bad bar.

If all their top shelf whiskeys are Wal-Mart store brand...you might be in a bad bar.

If it's packed with more douche bags than the dressing rooms on The View...you might be in a bad bar.

If the only dark brown liquor in the place, is an African-American lesbian...you’re definitely in a bad bar!

1 comment:

  1. If the Sunday morning bloody Mary drink has a string hanging out of it you may be in a bad bar?

    ReplyDelete