Wednesday, December 15, 2010

PLEASE MR. POSTMAN...PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!

A Whitefish bay postal carrier says he simply wanted to cheer up a woman on his mail rounds who seemed "stressed out." But, upon further review, the postal worker says delivering the mail in the nude probably wasn’t such a good idea.

A police report says the 52-year-old man told the woman he would deliver the mail to her office in Whitefish Bay completely naked to make her laugh. He says the woman dared him to do it, so he took the dare December 4 and brought the mail wearing only a smile.

The mail carrier was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior several days later at the North Shore Post Office. The man admitted delivering the mail naked was a stupid thing to do. Here's the top 10...

THINGS YOU MIGHT HEAR FROM YOUR NAKED MAILMAN.

10. I got your package right here.

9. Now this is what I call "junk" mail.

8. It may not be big but it's definitely first class.

7. This is what they mean by "special" delivery.

6. I’ve never gone postal but that doesn’t mean this thing doesn't shoot.

5. Now you see why they call us "male" men.

4. I don’t have any stamps but here's something else you can lick.

3. No, I didn't pee. That's just a little postage dew.

2. Do you want me to hold on to this for you or do you want me to stick it in your box?

1. I know this was sent Express but I bet you didn’t expect me to come this fast.

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