WISCONSIN BETTER THAN MEXICO?

TOP 10 REASONS WISCONSIN IS BETTER THAN BEING HERE IN RIVIERA MAYA, MEXICO.

10.Lifting shovel after shovel of wet, heavy snow is better for building strong back muscles than lifting beer after beer after beer.

9.Amid the sweet smelling hibiscus and dahlias down here, your farts really stand out so you can't get away with blaming the mill like back home in Kaukauna.

8.Seeing a howler monkey in the treetops or on your balcony is nothing compared to the bunch of baboons you work with back home every day.

7. Swim-up bars are nice, but you can hang out at Anduzzi's all day long without getting pruney fingers.

6.It takes a more powerful stream to write your name in the sand than in does to write your name in fresh snow.

5.It's much easier to keep your beer cold while ice fishing on Winnebago than when relaxing on a white beach overlooking the Caribbean.

4.You can safely stroll down the Lake Michigan surf in March without fear of having your delicate sensibilities offended by the presence of hot, topless European sunbathers.

3.Northeastern Wisconsin residents are smart enough to put salt on icy roads instead of wasting it on the rims of a seemingly endless supply of delicious, thirst-quenching margaritas.

2.Back home you can simply turn on the radio and listen to Murphy and Maino, whereas, down here in Mexico you have to go into the jungle among the wild parrots to hear that kind of mindless chatter and squawking.

1.Sure, zip-line rides, para-sailing and water skiing are all fun but they all lack the shear heart pounding excitement and suspense of driving to work on ice covered Highway 41 with some stupid douche bag right on your ass.