Norwegian Cross Country skier Bjorn Hjelmeset attributed his poor performance skiing the 2nd leg of the 4-man relay to... watching too much porn. Really! Bjorn told Sports Illustrated "I've think I have seen too much porn in the last 14 days. I have a room next to another skier. Every night there were unmistakable noises from his bedroom. So I think that is the reason I stunk up the competition". So, here's our....SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE WATCHING TOO MUCH PORN DURING THE OLYMPICS
If you accidentally poked another competitor with your pole...and you're a figure skater...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If the hill they're skiing down for the alpine events is in your lap...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If you've been seen wandering around the Olympic Village with your medal hanging from an appendage other than your neck...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If the flame of the Olympic torch isn't as red as the friction burns on your wiener...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If you've been repeatedly penalized for high sticking...and you’re not a hockey player...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If thanks to state of the art silicone lubricants, your crotch has a slicker surface than the bobsled track...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If your elbow has gotten a better workout than the lead sweeper on the Swedish curling team...you might be watching too much porn at the Olympics.
If the Double McTwist executed by Shaun White to garner the Snowboarding gold was nothing compared to the Double McTwist you did in your pants...you're definitely watching too much porn at the Olympics.
