BUD-JET TRAVEL

A new airline is launching this month. Jet America will be offering fares for as low as $9.00. Yes, $9.00!!! From places like Newark, New Jersey to Toledo, Ohio. So you see, $9.00 may actually be over-priced!

But here's our signs that you're flying a cut-rate airline!

If you're not allowed to board the flight unless you can prove you've brought enough cash for your seat belt rental...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If your plane can't land until the "ground crew" harvests a couple more rows of corn...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If during sudden decompression of the cabin, the masks that drop down are ones left over from last Halloween...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If, before boarding, instead of scanning you for metallic objects with high tech magnetic imaging equipment, the security agent just whacks you several times with a rusty wrench and listens for clanking sounds...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If they cancel the beverage service because during some turbulence the refreshment cart was rocked so hard they spilled all the Kool-ade...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If the nuts they pass out as snacks are ones they cut off passengers on a previous $9 flight...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If instead of offering a blockbuster movie during the flight, they just show public domain news footage from 9-11...you might be flying a cut rate airline.

If in the event of a "water landing" the plane’s only available floatation devices are the implants on the pre-op transsexual flight attendants...you’re definitely flying a cut rate airline.