Check out this sign from Marathon County. Then click on the Weenie of the Week icon to the right to find who was responsible for this mess!
Friday, July 31, 2009
SPEL MUTCH?
Check out this sign from Marathon County. Then click on the Weenie of the Week icon to the right to find who was responsible for this mess!
Thursday, July 30, 2009
PUTTING THE A.A. IN E.A.A.
This weekend, Joe Balzer is appearing at the E.A.A. Airventure '09. Joe is the pilot who was busted for flying a Northwest Airlines flight from Fargo to Minneapolis while loaded back in 1990. He's now been sober for 10 years and is author of the book Flying Drunk.
As a public service, here's our list of signs your pilot might be too drunk to fly!
If he's required to check his liver because it exceeds maximum size requirements for carry on baggage...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If you find him trying to "sleep it off"...in the overhead luggage compartment...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he makes an emergency landing just to make last call during happy hour at Hooters...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If during the pre-flight announcements he introduces his co-pilot as Captain Johnny Walker...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he’s at 30,000 feet and can’t remember how he got there, where he's going or who peed in his pants...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If the longest he's gone all day without a drink is the 90 minutes he spent trying to stick his car keys in the 747 ignition...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he personally de-ices the wings...with his breath...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
As a public service, here's our list of signs your pilot might be too drunk to fly!
If he's required to check his liver because it exceeds maximum size requirements for carry on baggage...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If you find him trying to "sleep it off"...in the overhead luggage compartment...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he makes an emergency landing just to make last call during happy hour at Hooters...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If during the pre-flight announcements he introduces his co-pilot as Captain Johnny Walker...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he’s at 30,000 feet and can’t remember how he got there, where he's going or who peed in his pants...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If the longest he's gone all day without a drink is the 90 minutes he spent trying to stick his car keys in the 747 ignition...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
If he personally de-ices the wings...with his breath...your pilot might be too drunk to fly.
SUMMIT SUMMIT
Here's our names for Obama's meeting over a couple beers with that Harvard professor and that cop.
10. The Miller Meeting
9. The Pabst Powwow
8. The Amstel Assembly
7. The Bud Huddle
6. Gathering of Guinness
5. The Corona Conference
4. Rolling Rock Round Table
3. Leinenkugle Conclave
2. The Coors Encounter of the Race Kind
1. A Bull Schlitz Session
10. The Miller Meeting
9. The Pabst Powwow
8. The Amstel Assembly
7. The Bud Huddle
6. Gathering of Guinness
5. The Corona Conference
4. Rolling Rock Round Table
3. Leinenkugle Conclave
2. The Coors Encounter of the Race Kind
1. A Bull Schlitz Session
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
NICK DIPAOLO RETURNS TO THE RICK AND LEN SHOW!!!
Friday morning at 8, ALL TIME FAVE Nick DiPaolo returns to the Rick and Len Show.
Nick is appearing at the Skyline Comedy Cafe this Thursday through Saturday. Make your reservations for this special event at 920-734-JOKE.
DO NOT MISS HIM!!! He is not for the faint of heart or the politically correct as is proven by this clip of him from The Comedy Central Roast of Larry the Cable Guy.
AMAZING!
Nick is appearing at the Skyline Comedy Cafe this Thursday through Saturday. Make your reservations for this special event at 920-734-JOKE.
DO NOT MISS HIM!!! He is not for the faint of heart or the politically correct as is proven by this clip of him from The Comedy Central Roast of Larry the Cable Guy.
AMAZING!
THE SCOOP
THE REAL REASONS BRETT'S NOT COMING BACK TO PLAY FOR THE VIKES.
10. Didn't feel really wanted in Minnesota since unlike Green Bay, their TV stations only sent half their reporters to camp outside his home and wait for his decision.
9. Having already ruined his reputation and his legacy, felt he had nothing left to accomplish.
8. Wanted to get an early start on making a decision about if he wants to come back next year.
7. Why bust your ass ruining a team's play-off chances by playing for them when you can ruin them just as well by NOT playing for them?
6. Has realized he doesn't need to put on a purple helmet to look like a dick.
5. Couldn't stand the thought of hearing the damn Hoop-dee-doo song all season.
4. Remember that look of stunned confusion and disappointment on the faces of Viking fans when he completed that shocking over time, game winning touchdown pass that Antonio Freeman miraculously caught at Lambeau in 2000? Just wanted to see that look on their faces one more time.
3. Not as interested when he found out that the Vikings no longer have a boat full of whores.
2. With his interception frequency on the rise, didn’t want to be remembered like a character in Brokeback Mountain, a well meaning country boy who's balls always end up in the wrong guy’s hands.
1. Was looking forward to returning to Lambeau until he realized it's not as much fun being part of a media circus when you’re playing with the clowns.
10. Didn't feel really wanted in Minnesota since unlike Green Bay, their TV stations only sent half their reporters to camp outside his home and wait for his decision.
9. Having already ruined his reputation and his legacy, felt he had nothing left to accomplish.
8. Wanted to get an early start on making a decision about if he wants to come back next year.
7. Why bust your ass ruining a team's play-off chances by playing for them when you can ruin them just as well by NOT playing for them?
6. Has realized he doesn't need to put on a purple helmet to look like a dick.
5. Couldn't stand the thought of hearing the damn Hoop-dee-doo song all season.
4. Remember that look of stunned confusion and disappointment on the faces of Viking fans when he completed that shocking over time, game winning touchdown pass that Antonio Freeman miraculously caught at Lambeau in 2000? Just wanted to see that look on their faces one more time.
3. Not as interested when he found out that the Vikings no longer have a boat full of whores.
2. With his interception frequency on the rise, didn’t want to be remembered like a character in Brokeback Mountain, a well meaning country boy who's balls always end up in the wrong guy’s hands.
1. Was looking forward to returning to Lambeau until he realized it's not as much fun being part of a media circus when you’re playing with the clowns.
Monday, July 27, 2009
ARCHIE CLUNKER
For those of you thinking about taking advantage of the government's Cash for Clunkers program, we at the Rick and Len Show put together a definitive list of signs that your vehicle might be a clunker.
If your shocks have less bounce left in them than the springs in Paris Hilton's Posturpedic...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the value of the blue book itself is greater than the blue book value of your car...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it emits more smoke than Willie Nelson's tour bus...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If your driveway has been the site of more fluid leaks than Larry King’s news chair...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it has more miles on it than the entire cast of The View...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If your fuel pump has blown more times than a Motley Crue groupie...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the Jesus from your dashboard is his hiding in your glove box because he’s too embarrassed to be seen riding in your car...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the odometer has rolled over more times than the Outagamie County District Attorney's office has for Judge Froehlich's son...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it’s even rustier than Rick's sexual technique...your vehicle is definitely a clunker!
If your shocks have less bounce left in them than the springs in Paris Hilton's Posturpedic...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the value of the blue book itself is greater than the blue book value of your car...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it emits more smoke than Willie Nelson's tour bus...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If your driveway has been the site of more fluid leaks than Larry King’s news chair...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it has more miles on it than the entire cast of The View...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If your fuel pump has blown more times than a Motley Crue groupie...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the Jesus from your dashboard is his hiding in your glove box because he’s too embarrassed to be seen riding in your car...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If the odometer has rolled over more times than the Outagamie County District Attorney's office has for Judge Froehlich's son...your vehicle might be a clunker.
If it’s even rustier than Rick's sexual technique...your vehicle is definitely a clunker!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
ROY WOOD JR. ROCKS THE RICK AND LEN SHOW
Tonight only (7.23), get two for one admission to see Roy Wood Jr. at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton because it's WAPL night!
Roy's been on Letterman, on Craig Ferguson and Chelsea Handler and now on the Rick and Len Show. And Friday morning, he'll join Rick and Len at 8.
If you can't make it for WAPL night on Thursday, catch one of his show Friday or Saturday at 8 and 10:15! Call and make reservations at 734-JOKE.
Get a little taste of Roy below. Why? Because "ho's need blankets!"
Roy's been on Letterman, on Craig Ferguson and Chelsea Handler and now on the Rick and Len Show. And Friday morning, he'll join Rick and Len at 8.
If you can't make it for WAPL night on Thursday, catch one of his show Friday or Saturday at 8 and 10:15! Call and make reservations at 734-JOKE.
Get a little taste of Roy below. Why? Because "ho's need blankets!"
| Jokes.com | ||||
| Roy Wood Jr. - Kids | ||||
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Wednesday, July 22, 2009
ANOTHER BRICK IN THE WALL-E
You know how when you play Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon while watching The Wizard of Oz the two seem to be in sync? (If not, click here for more info) Well, now some folks at have found that the same is true of Floyd's Another Brick in the Wall and last summer's Pixar hit Wall-E.
For more info, check out this article at Octavarius.com. Or just take a look at this, admittedly lousy, video from the same folks. It will at least give you an idea of how to sync it for yourself and make you wonder how high you have to be to just happen to have Another Brick in the Wall on at the same time as Wall-E?
For more info, check out this article at Octavarius.com. Or just take a look at this, admittedly lousy, video from the same folks. It will at least give you an idea of how to sync it for yourself and make you wonder how high you have to be to just happen to have Another Brick in the Wall on at the same time as Wall-E?
Thursday, July 16, 2009
MICHAEL LOFTUS JOINS RICK AND LEN AT MID VALLEE GOLF COURSE
The very funny Michael Loftus will join us Friday morning (7.17) at 8 while we're broadcasting from Mid-Vallee Golf Course prior to the Rick and Len Small Town Golf Outing.
See Michael at the Skyline Comedy Cafe tonight (7.16) and get 2 for 1 admission because it's WAPL night. Or see him Friday or Saturday at 8 or 10:15. Make your reservations at 920-734-joke.
See Michael at the Skyline Comedy Cafe tonight (7.16) and get 2 for 1 admission because it's WAPL night. Or see him Friday or Saturday at 8 or 10:15. Make your reservations at 920-734-joke.
| Jokes.com | ||||
| Michael Loftus - Drinking in Ireland | ||||
| ||||
WE ALL KNEW HE WAS FLAMING!
As a way of showing how Michael Jackson's painkiller addiction began, US WEEKLY has unearthed the never-before seen footage of his infamous Pepsi commercial accident, filmed in L.A.'s Shrine Auditorium on Jan. 27, 1984.
Obviously, we're appalled! But here it is!
FYI: It's kind of gross!
Obviously, we're appalled! But here it is!
FYI: It's kind of gross!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Thursday, July 9, 2009
THE DOCTOR IS IN...THE BEDROOM!!!
There really must be a genetic trait in Florida that makes people dumber than Everglades pond scum. A guy in Flagler County is charged with practicing medicine without a license for administering silicone injections to women's faces, butts and boobs from a clinic he set up in his bedroom. Dozens of stupid women paid between 400 and 600 dollars for the injections. The weird part is that he wasn't even using the kind of silicone that is made for use in the human body. he injected the same stuff they use protect furniture from stains!
So...how do you know that the doctor doing your silicone injection might be an imposter?
-If you show up for your appointment and find him laying on the couch, eating Cheetos and watcing Oprah.
-If he hands you a pamphlet on the stain-fighting benefits of ScotchGard.
-If the clinic waiting room doubles as his garage.
-If the exam room bed doesn't have stirrups, but it does have a Teddy Bear and stained Batman sheets on it.
-If the machine he uses to sterilize the medical equipment looks a lot like a Kenmore dishwasher.
-If the silicone clinic has posters of Pam Anderson, Dolly Parton and Morganna the Kissing Bandit on the walls right next to the doctor's lava lamp and clock radio.
-And if the doctor asks what kind of butt you want him to inject the silicone into. Leather, microfiber or Naugahyde...then the doctor doing your silicone injection is definitely an imposter.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
COPPERBOX GIG AND NEW ALBUM!
Our friends in the Oshkosh-based band CopperBox will be doing a free show this Thursday, July 9th at Houdini Plaza in downtown Appleton. It's part of the Heid Music Summer Concert Series. Showtime is 5:30. The band is led by button accordion master Danny Jerabek who proves that the squeezebox can rock! Listen for their killer version of Comfortably Numb done polka-style.
CopperBox has a new album out, too. Check out some music samples by clicking here.
OUR BRAINS MUST BE MADE OF CHEESE!
Here's another example of our ignorance when it comes to our own history. A survey of 1009 people about the Apollo Space Program of the 60's and 70's asked which two men were the first to walk on the moon. 11 people said it was Buzz Lightyear. Not Buzz Aldrin but BUZZ LIGHTYEAR...the cartoon character from Toy Story! Another 8 people said the very first man on the moon was Louis Armstrong. Come on, people! Everyone knows it was LANCE Armstrong, right?
Okay, it was Neil.
Here are some other confusions about history.
-Who wrote the Declaration of Independence? George Jefferson, of course.
-Who is the all time home run leader in Major League baseball? Bond...James Bond.
-Benjamin Button discovered electricity when lightning struck his kite.
-Duke Ellington defeated Napoleon Dynamite at the Battle of Waterloo.
-Joe DiMaggio was once married to Marilyn Manson.
-The most important leader in the civil rights movement of the 1960's was Rev. Martin Luther Earnhardt, Junior.
-And I think we all remember where we were when we heard that that Russian guy, Leon Trotsky shot John Lennon.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
MIKE MACREA AT THE MIC!
He's already been on Letterman, now comedian and impressionist Mike MacRae will make his debut on the Rick and Len Show Wednesday morning (7.1). Mike is appearing through Friday (no shows on the 4th!) at the Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton.
Call and make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE. Thursday night is WAPL night. Remind them of that when you phone them up and you'll get 2 for 1 admission!
Here's a little sample of Mike in action!
Mike on Letterman
Call and make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE. Thursday night is WAPL night. Remind them of that when you phone them up and you'll get 2 for 1 admission!
Here's a little sample of Mike in action!
Mike on Letterman
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