Thursday, April 30, 2009

THE NEVER ENDING STORY

Brett got his unconditional release from the New York Jets. Before he does anything rash and signs with you-know-who, perhaps he should take a look at these job alternatives and their pros and cons.

JOBS FOR BRETT FAVRE

SHOE SALESMAN
CON: He knows nothing about men's dress shoes.
PRO: He knows everything about flip-flops.

LAWYER
CON: Has no formal legal training.
PRO: Has plenty of family members with enough legal problems to start his own firm.

DELIVERYMAN
CON: The wear and tear of a long NFL career has taken it's toll on his body which could make if difficult for him to lift and convey heavy packages.
PRO: Has proven to Ted Thompson that he has no problem carrying a grudge.

DIET AND EXERCISE GURU
Pro: Has kept himself in great shape throughout is career.
Con: Even after 18 seasons in the NFL, hasn't handled as many balls as Richard Simmons.

AMERICAN IDOL JUDGE
PRO: His verbal skills are no match for the acid tongued Simon Cowell.
CON: It would be fun to watch him fight with Paula each week over their last Vicodin.

FRUIT OF THE LOOM MASCOT
PRO: His high celebrity profile would probably sell some underwear.
CON: There is only one purple uniform in which he'd look even more ridiculous than being dressed as a bunch of grapes.

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